an ambient work came on the radio…driving my dying old car up the crest of the hill that at one time led seemingly to nowhere…then to a job in polyester bell bottoms manning a cash register at magic mountain..then cal arts as a dream and one wild party…then as a student…….then this night….3 days after my mom passed on after so many years bedridden and unable to speak…….a kind of water began to pour…..floods and dams failing …..something inside eroding in the spaces and analog pads…….it felt for a second as though my car was to fly away deconstructed and winged away….every bit of geometry…every screw and material…..to just become a swarm and things in exploded view like the books of planes……..and she was gone……..and she was free from this…..and a horn honked…..a car passed……
.and it was as though there was no earth at all for a few seconds….no need ..no gravity…and no weight…..she was at peace now