by Maria Ramos-Chertok
(After Joe Brainard’s I Remember)
I remember when all the presidents were white men
Then I remember when that changed
And I remember how happy I was to be living at a time when I could see the first black family inhabit the White House
And I remember my friends talking about how they were worried it would rain and ruin Michelle’s hair
And I remember seeing them walk down the Pennsylvania Avenue
And I remember my thrill and joy
And now I remember when it changed back
I remember the hope of a woman president
Although I remember she was moderate and I remember our country needed more
And now I remember yesterday
When I watched the map of the US turn red and red and red
And I remember my terror
And my fear
And my saying, no it can’t be
And I remember shutting down
And not talking to my kids
And I remember my son telling me, “it’s going to be alright”
And I remember thinking, No, it’s not going to be alright
And I remember not wanting to say it out loud
I remember not wanting to voice the terror of what could happen
I remember crying alone all morning and afternoon and even now
And I remember reaching out to see who might offer me hope
And I remember the men who inspire me
Martin Luther King, Jr.
Malcolm X
Nelson Mandela
And I remembered that two of them were assassinated and one imprisoned for thirty years
And I remember why the struggle is called that
And I remember I must go on
Because it’s not okay
Maria is a writer whose work and art revolve around social justice issues. Thankfully, she is based in the blue bubble of the bay area.
