Love Like Fake News.
you’d sent me a letter that said you met someone
and were in love with someone
and you’d never been happier
so i left the house and almost walked into traffic
not suicidally, i still have some things to take care of
just absentmindedly, like, shit, here comes a school bus
better leap to safety
and i bought cigarettes for the first time in two weeks
spirit blacks, the ones that hurt to smoke, but only afterward
and i smoked two of them and felt sick
everyone’d been feeling sick since late january
even otherwise healthy people who ate complex carbs felt sick
people were calling out of work because they felt sick
office people, with desks, and bosses who understood their sickness
although, in fact, that’s a privilege only people who work on desks were given
imagine a dishwasher texting their supervisor, saying
“can’t come into work today. sick about the whole thing.”
their supervisor would tell them to come in or fuck all the way off
anyway, everyone was feeling like that around then
it was a sick time to be alive
but it’s hard to say ‘sick’ or talk about sickness
without people thinking you’re either using slang
or making fun of disturbed
but it was so sick
and a lot of people came down with the sickness
and for a lot of them, their condition hasn’t improved
but it was around this time that i got up the nerve to call you
and we spoke about the letter you’d sent
but before i had a chance to go over my talking points
of which i had several, on a little index card
you confessed that parts of the letter were a fabrication
there was no someone
there was no love
there was no happiness
you confessed in a lighthearted manner, i guess to add some levity
to an otherwise deeply emotional situation
and i said: you fake newsed me
and you said: yes, those were alternative facts
and then i laughed until i coughed
and you asked if i was sick
and i thought no, but what i said was yes
i said i hadn’t been feeling well lately, on account of you know
and it’s been cold and i’m not used to eastern winter
and you said you understood, but i’m not so sure you did
but then we exchanged some pleasantries
and then we hung up, and i haven’t heard from you since
but that was the first and only time i’ve been so excited
thrilled
overjoyed
to hear fake news
it’d be nice if someone could explain to all the sick people
on a fraught conference call
“there’s something you need to know:
i was only kidding”
Theo Francis has previously appeared in Fanzine, and is currently at work on a manuscript of poems. You can reach him at acornfetish@gmail.com and @faketheofrancis on Twitter.
